Your trail guide
While everyone else shows up in lifted Jeeps and 35s, Memaw rolls up on the most underestimated rig on the trail. She's been out there leading the group, giving advice nobody asked for, and getting there eventually. Every time.
Memaw Clark
Sean Clark is a real trail guide. Memaw has noticed. Same hat, same trails, and lately, if you ask her around the campfire, the same last name. No one has asked Sean.
| Sean Clark | Memaw Clark | |
|---|---|---|
| Hat | Wide-brim bush hat | Identical. Coincidence. |
| Rig | 80 Series Land Cruiser | Mobility scooter |
| Spare parts | Sourced from his other Land Cruiser | Not needed. Nothing breaks at 4 mph. |
| Recovery gear | Winch, straps, traction boards | Sean |
| Guided trips | Professional | Also professional, per Memaw |
Memaw's trail rules
- Air down before the trail. Memaw doesn't bother. Her tires are solid rubber.
- Slow is smooth, smooth is fast. Memaw is very, very smooth.
- Never wheel alone. Bring a spotter, a recovery strap, and a tin of butterscotch candies.
- Know your vehicle's limits. Memaw's sticker says "Do not operate off pavement." She has never read it.
- Pick a line and commit. Memaw's line is whichever one has a ramp.
- Carry spares. Spare battery, spare cardigan, spare opinions about your driving.
- Know when to make camp. Memaw made camp in her chair by the fire, mid-conversation, at the beach campout. Nobody had the heart to wake her. Nobody could have.
The rig
| Drivetrain | Rear-wheel drive. Rear-wheel everything, honestly. |
|---|---|
| Top speed | 4 mph. 5 downhill with a tailwind. |
| Lift | None. The seat swivels, which is better. |
| Comms | Safety flag on a pole. Visible from every point on the trail. |
| Recovery points | The front basket. |
| Range | Until the battery dies or the story ends, whichever comes last. |